I realize as much as I long to be a person in the moment, totally present to the now, a lot of my sacred moments are caught in hindsight. I pause to ask, "Where were You? How did You show up for me Lord?" My mind wanders round and round, collects the comings and goings of my day, the interactions and the solitude, the things I saw and the things I may have missed, but it's normally after this swirling in the mind that in the quiet, stillness, he reveals, he comes.
Even as I write I participate in a discipline, and simply show up, not entirely sure what will come only that it's in there, deep, where Jesus dwells in that most inner centered chamber. As I write I'm asking, "Jesus, what do you want me to see?"
It's never what I think. Which is why it takes time. And quiet. And space.
Writing. Prayer. Disciplines relies on faith. Faith that as I show up and participate in this process I will be met. Met by a God who loves to be found or even more so loves to find us.
My mind wanders back to a walk I took earlier this week. As I walked and my mind opened up, I was reminded of the dinner table the night before when my friend's daughter asked, "What are your favorite rides at Disneyland?" She had just returned from a not one, not two, but five day trip to the Happiest Place on Earth and was eager to share the memories.
"Mmmmm...let's see. Oooo I always loved Peter Pan! Getting to fly over London. It was magical!
Yup! They all involve night contrasted by * * stars * *, * * fireflies * *,
* * light * *!
And as with many curious things I learn about myself in conversation, I had this little moment and then forgot about it, until my morning walk.
Which leads to now. I noted this observation in an email to myself and as I was typing it came to mind. Often times God gives us these little moments and we forget or think they're nothing really important. Time, writing, and hundreds of hours in retreats or soul care have proved to me most the time they are kingdom treasure hunts. Special, intimate ways Jesus draws his followers and likes to speak to them about their heart.
So when something like this comes up I just sorta let it marinate, not trying to force anything, and let it sit, waiting for the One who delights in the reveal.
I'm tempted to do something with this space, create a Ta-dah, instead I think I'll close trusting this is a nice space to leave us in...waiting....trusting...opening up to Jesus' reveal.
Look forward to keeping you posted. And I'm curious, what is something that's recently come to the forefront of your mind that you're curious about that may reveal something about you and/or our Lord?